Worcester, Massachusetts is home to a lot of things. The Smiley Face was invented here. It‘s the home of the first liquid-fueled rocket. But more than anything, it‘s the place where the world’s preeminent bubble alchemists produce a lineup of wild new flavors every year.
Somewhere in this city, Orson the Polar Bear and the greatest minds in carbonation are hard at work mashing together flavors to create new combinations. Twice a year, like clockwork, the zero-calorie wizards come out with a new roster of seasonal flavors, including three brand-new fizzy inventions.
It’s like Daylight Saving Time, but not terrible. That’s right, it’s time to meet the 2024 Polar Seltzer Winter flavors, a couple of which are pretty bonkers.
Nectarine Grapefruit? That‘s standard procedure for Polar, which has spent years finding new ways to mash up fruits together. Every year, I think they’re going to start running out of combinations — and it never happens.
But Elderflower Starlight? Spiced Pear Cider? Those are new.
I don‘t know what starlight is supposed to taste like. But I drink whatever Worcester’s most famous roadside polar bear gives me, so I’m just going to have to trust him.
Polar Seltzer Winter 2024 Flavors | Review, Rankings
As always, the wave of seasonal flavors features three brand-new flavors and two flavors that are returning from past years.
- NEW: Elderflower Starlight
- NEW: Spiced Pear Cider
- NEW: Nectarine Grapefruit
- RETURNING: Frosted Boysenberry
- RETURNING: Blood Orange Cranberry
Both Frosted Boysenberry and Blood Orange Cranberry debuted in the Winter 2023 flavor lineup before returning this year.
What do the Polar flavors taste like?
NEW FLAVOR: Elderflower Starlight — The first phrase that popped into my head after trying this is “fuzzy lemon.”
The “Starlight” element of this flavor comes through with a potent citrus flavor. Meanwhile, the “Elderflower” is represented by a supportive floral component.
It’s the sort of flavor that could have gone off the rails easily. But the seltzer sticks the landing.
It‘s the opposite of what you see sometimes on the “Great British Baking Show” where contestants try adding rose water or lavender extract. It’s always too much.
NEW FLAVOR: Spiced Pear Cider — Wow, this flavor is potent in a way that I don’t think any flavor before it has been.
It opens up with a level-headed brush of pear flavor that rolls across the palate. Then the winter spices come in.
The back end of this seltzer is a heavy wave of winter spices like nutmeg and cinnamon. It’s a little bit jarring.
It‘s like a Christmas party that’s thrown way too early. Sure, I‘m having fun, but I‘m surprised to see it. It‘s bright and bubbly. It’s like drinking a Sam Adams Winter Warmer on a 90-degree day.
This is one of the most interesting flavors Polar has put out. But it’s a bit overbearing. The spiced back end is a bit cloying in the way it lingers. I was interested, but lost my desire to drink more after a few sips.
NEW FLAVOR: Nectarine Grapefruit — This is the latest in a long line of combo flavors that incorporate citrus elements.
The first thing you get is the mellow orange-like citrus from the nectarine. Then you get a tart undertone of the grapefruit.
There‘s definitely more nectarine here. It’s an even-keeled hit, balanced but potent while the grapefruit is playing bass in the background.
RETURNING FLAVOR: Frosted Boysenberry — I still don‘t know exactly what a boysenberry tastes like. I also don’t know how having it be “frosted” matters.
All I know is that this tastes like a shy cranberry.
RETURNING FLAVOR: Blood Orange Cranberry — This is another classic flavor combo that combines citrus with a tart flavor.
Here, the blood orange is the lead flavor, coming out with a zesty wave of orange. Meanwhile, the cranberry acts as a pleasant support act. It’s not surprising, cranberry is the low-key seltzer MVP.
What’s the best new flavor?
Of the five Winter Seasonal flavors, Blood Orange Cranberry is tops. It’s a great idea with great execution.
Of the new flavors, I liked the Elderflower Starlight the most. It’s a more ambitious flavor and I think it sticks the landing.
The final word
The addition of three new flavors brings the all-time flavor rankings to 87. Please note that most seltzer flavors are good. A flavor in the 60-70 range is still a solid choice. It’s just that the flavors in the 1-20 range are really good.
As always, these rankings are not scientific, but are correct.
87. Blueberry Lemonade
86. Mango Cherry Bliss (Summer Seasonal)
85. Vanilla
84. Seltzer
83. Pomegranate Apple (Winter Seasonal)
82. Lemon Cola (Polar Park Exclusive)
81. Hibiscus Cloudberry (Winter Seasonal)
80. Blackberry Mango Punch
79. Minotaur Mayhem (Impossibly Good)
78. Lime
77. Strawberry Honeydew (Summer Seasonal)
76. Ruby Red Grapefruit
75. Jalapeño Citrus Margarita (Limited Edition)
74. Mermaid Songs (Impossibly Good)
73. Raspberry Lime
72. Triple Berry
71. Strawberry Lemonade (Seltzer’ade)
70. Cranberry Cider (Winter Seasonal)
69. Vanilla Zen
68. Blueberry Lemonade (Seltzer’ade)
67. Blackberry Mango Punch (Summer Seasonal)
66. Polar 100 (Special Edition)
65. Blood Orange Sangria
64. Passionfruit Blueberry (Summer Seasonal)
63. Yeti Mischief (Impossibly Good)
62. Strawberry Watermelon
61. Yuzu Orange Blossom
60. Pomegranate
59. Cranberry Bramble (Winter Seasonal)
58. Dragon Fruit Lemonade
57. Raspberry Rosé (Summer Seasonal)
56. Be Mine (Valentine’s Day Edition)
55. Cranberry Clementine
54. Mango Limeade (Seltzer’ade)
53. Kiwi Pink Grapefruit (Summer Seasonal)
52. Guava Mule (Summer Seasonal)
51. Pineapple Guava
50. Spiced Pear Cider
49. Mandarin
48. Blackberry Clementine (Winter Seasonal)
47. Seaside Watermelon Punch (Summer Seasonal)
46. Watermelon Lemonade (Seltzer’ade)
45. Pixie Lights (Impossibly Good)
44. Pineapple Lemonade (Seltzer’ade)
43. Cherry Pomegranate
42. Prickly Pear Citrus (Winter Seasonal)
41. Ginger Lime Mule
40. Berry Sweet Grapefruit
39. Grapefruit Melon Kiss (Winter Seasonal)
38. Nectarine Grapefruit
37. Key Lime Grapefruit
36. Toasted Coconut
35. Coconut Limeade
34. Ginger Peach (Winter Seasonal)
33. Tropical Cherry (Summer Seasonal)
32. Tart Cherry Limeade (Seltzer’ade)
31. Concord Clementine (Winter Seasonal)
30. Watermelon Mojito (Summer Season)
29. Frosted Boysenberry
28. Papaya Breeze (Summer Seasonal)
27. Black Cherry
26. Unicorn Kisses (Impossibly Good)
25. Georgia Peach
24. Pineapple Pomelo
23. Blood Orange Lemonade (Seltzer’ade)
22. Blackberry Citron (Winter Seasonal)
21. Upside Down Plum (Winter Seasonal)
20. Pomegranate Champagne
19. Elderflower Starlight
18. Raspberry Limoncello (Summer Seasonal)
17. Blood Orange Cranberry
16. Pink Summer Iced Tea (Summer Seasonal)
15. Lemon
14. Blueberry Tangerine (Summer Seasonal)
13. Starfruit Lemonade
12. I’d Rather Drink Alone (Valentine’s Day Edition)
11. Peach Iced Tea (Summer Seasonal)
10. Black Cherry Vanilla
9. Strawberry Margarita (Summer Seasonal)
8. Strawberry Créme (Summer Seasonal)
7. Raspberry Pink Lemonade (Seltzer’ade)
6. Pink Lady Apple & Lemon
5. Orange Vanilla
4. Nectarine Lemon (Summer Seasonal)
3. Dragon Whispers (Impossibly Good)
2. Perfectly Plum Summer (Summer Seasonal)
1. Cranberry Lime
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“I ate it so you don’t have to” is a regular food column about off-beat eats, both good and bad. I picked the name years ago and now we’re sort of stuck with it.
You can send any praise/food suggestions to nomalley@masslive.com. Please send all criticisms and complaints about my rankings to atourangeau@masslive.com. You can check out the rest of the series here.